Werner Tian Fischer

'the jazzy guitarist with a predilection for catchy tunes'

[chapter i]

The Vicar's Tale

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"And when the floods receded and the sun was out again, the locusts started to sing. It gave him a chill. Never had he heard such a sweet melody. And the rhythm of a million strange voices in a strange land. ‘Twas then that he remembered why he had come here all along. To infect the Chinese soul with some sweet Rock ‘n’ Roll, a twinkle of cool Jazz and a spoonful of yearning Rhythm & Blues."

  • "And when the floods receded and the sun was out again, the locusts started to sing. It gave him a chill. Never had he heard such a sweet melody. And the rhythm of a million strange voices in a strange land. ‘Twas then that he remembered why he had come here all along. To infect the Chinese soul with some sweet Rock ‘n’ Roll, a twinkle of cool Jazz and a spoonful of yearning Rhythm & Blues." (Chinese Soul, p. 2)
  • "Although he had been allowed to rest in the imperial chamber, a certain anxiety got hold of his mind and made him toss and turn on the couch. Earlier that day, he had been cruising the streets in a huge off-roader with the heiress herself at the steering wheel. Maybe the discrepancy between life as it could be and living as it was started to disquiet him." (Chinese Soul, p. 3)
  • "They set out very early the next dawn. Their journey promised to be a long one, from west to east. Just like the one before and the one before that. Taxi, subway, subway, subway, and taxi again. It took the better part of the morning until they arrived at a place more in the east than where his wife had lived in a previous life." (Chinese Soul, p. 3)
  • "That evening his future boss invited them to dinner at a house where there were many mansions with fireproof floors. He was wearing a frock, smoking a cheap Cuban cigar & addressed them in German which is his favorite language whenever he talks real business. He depicted their future in flowery colors, deep reds and crimson, just like the lotus blossoms at the Summer Palace they had seen but a few days earlier." (Chinese Soul, p. 2)
  • "They were welcomed by two harlots in drag who revealed themselves as the administrators of the renowned Institute of Contemporary Music and Dance. They said, nice to meet you but come another time and do a showcase for us. We penguins like to be entertained before we buy." (Chinese Soul, p. 3)
  • "As he lay sleepless he decided not to dance for the penguins, at least not yet, but to take his daughter and his wife off to Shangri-La, the land of happiness and longevity." (Chinese Soul, p. 3)
  • "The ocean exerted its magic. It had a calming effect on his nervous system and took off the edge of his worries. The evening before, he and his wife had had a redeeming talk. He realized that her distant behavior had arisen out of her disappointment and embarrassment by how difficult life had become in the city of the north. Yes it was true. The post-modern city had incredibly spread since her departure almost a decade ago. Like an octopus it now covered most of the pastures and old quarters that had still been untouched at her time. The city had lost a lot of its sleepy appeal. The bright red Xiali taxis had been replaced by multi-colored ones of more modern brands. Beijing had become a confusing and strange place - even to her." (Chinese Soul, p. 5)
  • "The ocean made him reminiscent of the past. In his younger years he had gone on a mission to the land of Camoes. He had learnt the master’s language rather quickly but lost his over-zealous lover anyway. He had been accompanied by the Writer, his long-time buddy and partner in crime who had found Latin love there and cut his first jewels. In comparison to the gente do mar the natives here didn’t strike him much as a nation of mariners. They hardly knew how to swim. Well, had their forebears not forbidden and burnt their imperial fleet some decades before the latter nation set out to explore and conquer the world at the dawn of Modern Age?" (Chinese Soul, p. 6)
  • "The Writer had been a good swimmer too. He sort of missed his banter. After a long period of silence he had received a message from him only a few hours earlier stating that the Big Apple’s Chinatown was better than the real thing. He had jokingly answered that he should watch his back, that they used chopsticks there too. Fact was that the Writer didn’t know the real thing and probably never would. It had taken him nearly fifty years to cross the Atlantic." (Chinese Soul, p. 7)
  • "His mood was benign. They started to explore the seaside at Beidaihe and to their great surprise found out that the Cyrillic alphabet was omnipresent in the official buildings as well as the hotels, restaurants and stores. He was the only Caucasian of Non-Russian extraction by near and by far. Had he traveled such a long way only to gaze at two unintelligible languages to him displayed on the street signs and cardboards?" (Chinese Soul, p. 7)
  • "They made an early start the next morning. They changed hotels and were to be taken to a miraculously white sandy beach by a friendly taxi driver. Unfortunately, the sandy beach at Nandaihe turned out to be a bit of a let-down. It was a fairly long ride to get there, the sky wasn’t clear - as was regularly the case in the mornings - and the white sandy beach turned out to be the color of most sand. It was clearly a trap expertly designed for Chinese tourists. Mostly in buses, but also in taxis and cars of all kinds they had come. The main attraction consisted of a few sculptures made of - what else? - sand. But there were also horse rides, boat fights and tents available." (Chinese Soul, p. 8)
  • "He woke up in the still of the night. He had had a sound sleep but still felt a bit disconcerted about the events of the past day. When his girl woke up she crept up to his bed and sang ‘Happy Birthday’ to him showering him with her gifts: the seashells she had collected two days before and a sheet of stickers she had been given to at Beijing’s IKEA outlet. His wife also joined in and presented him a box of instant coffee portions. He was deeply moved. The three of them spend some more time in bed and then had breakfast. They listened to ‘Extra Texture’, his favorite George Harrison record." (Chinese Soul, p. 8)
  • "When he and his girl took off for the beach she was wearing her orange and yellow duck outfit (with matching cap). He was in his lately acquired navy blue Chinese swimming trunks. On the way they stopped at a small shop and bought a little pink water hose. On the beach they had an encounter of the not-so-nice sort. A guardian forbade his little girl to swim where she wanted to. He tried to point out to the guy that there were a number of Chinese swimming there but could only guess at the reason of this man’s unfriendly behavior. They finally looked for another spot. He felt a bit proud when his daughter strode fearlessly into the water only protected by the water hose and her bright orange swimming aid to fight off the perils that lurked in those treacherous seas." (Chinese Soul, p. 10)
  • “It takes a man to have a girl. He remembered a phrase coined by Eammonn O’Malley, an Irish clergyman and his former drumage provider, when his girl returned with a green bucket full of salt water with two tiny little fish swimming in it. The sky was finally clearing up. A gentle breeze started to blow. The tide was coming in. He felt confident and calm. And the next morning they would return to Beijing and the Phoenix Mountain." (Chinese Soul, p. 11)

In Beijing / At The Seaside / Simple Twist Of Fate / Peixinhos do Mar / Xiansheng, Xiansheng / Xmas May Come And Birthdays Too